Holiday Work Party

[newnumber6]

So last night was the Christmas-era party for my work, and this year, I decided to go.

How was it? Well, it was another of those situations where, while it wasn't horrible, made me wonder why I even bothered. I suppose it wasn't quite as socially nerve-wracking as it could have been... while waiting for the bus that would go to the venue, I ran into another co-worker, one of the people I've actually talked to a bit at work (largely because she's an extremely talkative person... the kind that changes topics on a dime and tells long stories about her family without being prompted on the subject and doesn't really leave time to get more than a few words in edgewise... which I suppose isn't all in my situation since I'm not much of a talker), and have a little in common with (she also watches cartoons).

We got there and a bit of awkwardness because it was time to choose a table and I hadn't been explicitly invited to sit anywhere, but manage to work up the social wherewithal to sit next to the same person I'd been 'talking with' (more like 'listening to') and assume an implied invitation to continue that companionship in absence of any other evidence to the contrary. In fact most of the people at that table were the same people I sat with last time I was there (the specific person I met in transit wasn't there that year, so it was kid of a weird coincidence, except perhaps that we were the people who showed up right on time). Still, it was a decent-sized table and, aside from a few minutes of conversation I was mostly silent the whole time while other people talked.

Food was okay, chicken (a little pink) and roast beef (a bit dry, even with the au jus), and some sides that were decent. Then of course they did the raffle... I didn't win anything. Everyone at my table who was eligible (at least, I believe, maybe one exception) won something, except me, none of the really nice prizes, but something. And my ticket number actually was pulled, but they were getting people in the crowd to pull tickets from a bowl and then handing them in order to the person at the mike to call them... I saw my ticket pulled (by someone at my table) but before it got up to the mike, the last prize was given away. Which seems to pretty much be how my life goes. ;)

After dinner there was a few minutes of entertainment, some kind of performance of Middle Eastern or perhaps South Asian dancing (not sure which, we have a lot of employees from both those regions... I think the latter), which was not especially entertaining to me, both because it's "not my thing" (not because of cultural issues, but rather because it's dancing at all... I don't even listen to music in general, and dancing is one of those associated arts that is kind of lost on me), and also because too many people blocked my view of most of it.

Then, although there was time set aside for music or dancing, a number of people were starting to leave, and I was already pretty beat and headed home too (the person I was with also left at the same time and we shared part of the subway, although to be honest, I'd probably have preferred to just read the book I brought for the bus ride).

All in all, I guess on some theoretical level it's "good" that I "got out" and was "among people" rather than indulging my strong hermit tendencies, and yet... I know I would have had more fun alone at home, hence the "why did I bother?" wonderment.

I wasn't made to be among people and it's hard to shake the feeling that I should probably stop trying.

Comments

[iamrman82.livejournal.com]

At my work's Christmas party the only entertainment was a disco. Obviously, I engaged somebody in a dance off. Here's a piece of advise: Never dance to U Can't Touch This and Gangdam Style in quick succession.

[newnumber6.livejournal.com]

That is a piece of advice I will almost certainly follow (even if I completely forget it was given).